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Emotional Availability Self-Assessment Quiz
For Parents With Children Under Two Years Old*

 
ALMOST
NEVER
SOMTIMES
ALMOST
ALWAYS
 
1
2
3
4
5
1.  My baby is upset whenever I leave the room and seems to play mostly near me. 
 
2.  My baby doesn't seem to notice when I come back into the room.  
 
3.  My baby doesn't crawl/walk to me much.  
 
4.  I wish my baby were happier when he/she is with me.     
 
5.  My baby looks at me and listens to me when I try to talk to him/her.        
 
6.  My baby likes to be with me the most.  
 
7.  My baby is lots of fun to be around.      
 
8.  My baby is very independent and mostly likes to play on his/her own.        
 
9.  My baby seems to "light up" when he/she sees me.      
 
10. After I leave the room, my baby seems really happy when I come back.   
 
11. My baby barely notices me.           
 
12. My baby is "cranky" most of the time.    
 
13. My baby seems to understand what I mean most of the time.      
 
14. I feel my baby tries to communicate with me. 
 
15. When I try to play with my baby, he/she seems too busy and mostly moves away. 
 
16. It's hard to get my baby to play with me for very long.        
 
 
1
2
3
4
5


Scoring Your Test: This test was developed for this website as a brief introduction into emotional availability and is not a formal assessment that has been tested in research or in the field.

Questions 5, 6, 7, 9, 10, 13, and 14:  If you scored 28-35 total for these questions, your emotional availability is relatively high in relationship with your child.

Questions 1, 2, 3, 4, 8, 11, 12, 15, and 16: If you scored 28-35 total for these questions, your emotional availability with this particular child needs some work; a reading of this child’s behavior and emotions indicates that he or she may need more to feel emotionally secure at this time. Do not be alarmed but reassured that you can work to remake your relationship. Suggestions for relationship remake can be found in some of the books listed at the end of this website. Alternatively, amazon.com has many parenting books that can be helpful. Type ‘attachment’ or ‘emotions’ or ‘secure parenting’ or the like on a search engine to locate some relevant readings.